What can someone do in 30 seconds? Well, they can melt butter in a microwave for starters. They can also wash the germs from their hands, preventing the spread of horrific diseases like The Flu, or the even more terrifying Flu With an Unnecessary Prefix That Makes it Sound Even More Scary. They can tell a joke, watch a commercial, delete the junkmail from their inbox, guzzle a carbonated beverage for a belching contest or come up with a better idea for a sitcom than anything that’s been featured on primetime TV for the last ten years. They can also save the world.

It’s worth nothing that Half-Minute Hero is really several games in one. The Hero portion (Hero 30) is obviously the main focus and the most in-depth campaign, but there are three more games (Evil Lord 30, Princess 30 and Knight 30) that serve to build upon the main campaign’s story and characters. Although three of these mode are available from the start (Knight 30 must be unlocked), it’s important to play through each one in order as they take place chronologically.

Hero 30 places you in the shoes of The Hero, a young man in search of adventure who teams up with The Time Goddess to stop the various levels’ Evil Lords from casting the Spell of Destruction and destroying the world. Each level is its own sort of mini-RPG world, with some taking place in deserts, some in forests, and some that I won’t spoil because they’re awesome. The basic goal for each of these levels (of which there are somewhere in the neighborhood of 40 to 50, counting all of the branching paths) is to level The Hero up until he’s strong enough to defeat the Evil Lord. Weapons, items and in some cases NPCs can be obtained to help things along, but ultimately it’s The Hero’s level that will make the difference. Of course, only the first few levels are that simple, and later ones will require some brain-bending and a little trial-and-error to get right. Some levels will require you to obtain a specific item before you can face the Evil Lord, and others will throw you curve-balls like not having any monsters to kill so you can’t level up. Every level also has its own share of items and equipment you can find or purchase, and any previously obtained arms and armor can be worn into later levels. This collection aspect, coupled with the two “Titles” that can be earned in each level when special conditions have been met, make for an incredibly deep and addicting experience. It’s obvious that Hero 30 is the real meat of Half-Minute Hero.

Evil Lord 30 switches things up by putting you in control of The Beautiful Evil Lord, 100 years after the events in Hero 30. Whereas The Hero would fight monsters to level up and defeat the level’s boss in order to prevent the destruction of the world, The Beautiful Evil Lord is looking for a way to lift the curse placed on the love of his life. An evil wizard turned her into a bat-umbrella, you see, and The Beautiful Evil Lord wants her back to her usual, radiant self. So he gets his answers the only way he knows how; by beating them out of the humans using an army of monsters he can summon and command. It functions much like a simplified RTS with a 30 second time limit (he has to defeat his enemies before the sun comes up or it could ruin his flawless complexion), coupled with a rock-paper-scissors styled system of using Nimble, Heavy and Ranged units. It’s fun and it’s funny, but Evil Lord 30 just isn’t as deep or involved as Hero 30. Plus it’s over too quickly as far as I’m concerned.

Princess 30 takes place another 100 years after Evil Lord 30 and tasks you, as the princess, with finding a cure for her sick father. The wilderness is a dangerous place, however, so the princess must defend herself. Using her father’s crossbow (which turns her into somewhat of a homicidal maniac whenever she holds it) and a small army of loyal knights, she braves the dangers of the world in order to save The King. This plays like a side-scrolling shooter, with players moving either horizontally or vertically along the screen holding down the “Fire” button as waves of enemies are thrown at them. Some sidequests will unlock new abilities such as being able to move over rough terrain with less of a penalty to your overall speed, but it still just isn’t as extensive as the Hero 30 campaign, and much like Evil Lord 30 is over too quickly.

Lastly we have Knight 30, which spins the whole 30 second time limit thing around. Instead of having to complete your objectives in under 30 seconds, you now have to survive for 30 seconds in order to win. As The Knight, you must protect The Sage for these 30 seconds while he casts his own spell which will cleanse the area of corruption and destroy all of its monsters. There are weapons and other random items that The Knight can pick up and use to repel the monsters, as well as various traps and other equipment players can add to their inventory beforehand that will distract or stun them, but none of them are absolutely necessary. In fact, most of the levels can actually be completed by just dragging The Sage to a corner and letter the enemy AI walk itself in circles. It’s not pretty, but it’s also not very engaging, and while Knight 30 wasn’t what I would call “bad,” it was certainly the least engaging of the four main campaigns.

Once Knight 30 is completed, there are still two more secret modes to unlock. I won’t spoil the surprise, but I will say they not only tie all of the different stories together quite nicely, they’re also decidedly epic. Never mind the fact that it’s a game using 2D sprites and goofy characters, the last few levels in Hero 30 as well as these final two game modes are downright awe-inspiring. I’m truly amazed by the apparently effortless way the world of Half-Minute Hero quietly shifted from “Goofy Quirk-Fest” to “HOLY CRAP! THIS IS THE VERY DEFINITION OF EPIC!”, and XSEED and Marvelous deserve a lot of credit for their efforts and accomplishments.

With all of that in mind, there’s still a lot more to Half-Minute Hero. Every campaign uses some very simple 2D sprites for its characters and monsters, but they all possess a certain charm and humor despite their lack of detail. Likewise, each game mode contains its own score, and while there are only a few different melodies for each one, they’re all incredibly diverse and very, VERY good. The Evil Lord 30 soundtrack is especially notable. On top of that, enemies, equipment and other characters encountered will be logged in The Goddess Chamber, where you can find some very funny descriptions, as well as the occasional character artwork. Not only is this artwork beautiful, it’s also a clever satire on the games of old and their breathtaking character art used to represent ridiculously simple (and often lame) in-game designs.

When you get right down to it, Half-Minute Hero is a niche game, and as such it almost certainly won’t get the attention it deserves. But if you’re the type of gamer who will try anything once, likes to laugh or has a soft spot for the “RPGs of Olde” then you’d be doing yourself (and the developers) a disservice by not running to the store and buying yourself a copy right now. It’s a fantastic game that gives back 20 times what you put in to it. It’s got more character and personality than most games that take up over 100 times the disk space. And hey, it’s a heck of a lot more fun than melting butter.

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Things We Liked: An honest-to-goodness fresh take on a tired formula. It’s not afraid to make fun of itself or its inspirations. Full of memorable moments and experiences and an even more memorable soundtrack. It has a Monty Python reference in it.

Things We Disliked: The other modes (aside from Hero 30) feel almost like throwaways, despite their obvious potential. Not a lot of music variety within each individual game mode. No Half-Minute Hero 2 yet.

Target Audience: RPG lovers. People who aren’t afraid to laugh, at themselves or others. Any and all PSP owners.

(Half-Minute Hero – Developer: Marvelous Entertainment. Publisher: XSEED Games. Available on PlayStation Portable. Buy it Now at Amazon.com. New to CFD!’s reviews? Read our explanation here.)