Bionic Commando is coming. Mark your calenders for May 12th; that’s the date that will find gamers stateside will be swinging through the crumbling ruins of Ascension City as wrongly imprisoned government operative, Nathan Spencer while Japan sits on their thumbs until June 25th.

This re-envisioning of the classic side-scrolling swinging, action platformer will be hitting Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 on those dates with a PC version to follow “shortly after” according to Capcom.

True story time, kids: Mike Patton, the former Mr. Bungle and current Tomahawk/Fantomas/Faith No More (yes, they’re re-uniting) vocalist, voices Mr. Spencer. In 1999, on tour supporting what ended up being Mr. Bungle’s final album, “California”, I was lucky enough to see them live at Toad’s Place in New Haven, CT. During the brain-melting “Travolta”, Patton dove into the crowd and surfed around while wailing a verse. As he thrashed and flailed, trying to get back to the stage in time for the breakdown, he kicked me square in the eye. I had a nice shiner at work the next day with an awesome story to go along with it.

No, there was no really game-related point to that story. I just needed to fill space. Plus, I love re-telling it. Sue me.